Tag Archive for movies

Pretty in Pink Original Ending

I made a thing, just for fun.  I got a copy of the book for Pretty in Pink that has the original Duckie Wins ending, and provide some commentary, analysis and trivia on the movie, the pros and cons of the possible endings, and then read the original ending.  Enjoy!

 

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Wonder Woman: Inspiration and Pain and Moving Forward

Wonder Woman. So many reactions to this movie.  And for me, the movie itself has not only inspired the Feels, but the reactions to the movie have as well, good and bad.

Wonder Woman

 

Most reactions that I see are inspiring and wonderful, such as this list of reactions from students in a Kindergarten class, or this awesome video of a woman inspired to play like Wonder Woman and kicking imaginary butt.  The garden hose bit gives me endless joy.

I see all of the people uplifted and inspired by this movie and it makes my heart sing.

There have also been negative reactions too.  Some, as one would expect, from men who just don’t get it (or feel somehow threatened in their worldview).  But also criticisms from women who felt the movie misstepped with hurtful exclusions or stereotyping, or was too narrow in its feminism.

I posted before about how I wished we could have more “Yes, And” rather than “Yes, But.”
I see “Yes, and” in the reactions to the Wonder Woman movie like the Bazaar piece, and I find that as inspiring as the movie itself.  Because how we talk about issues even in a Wonder Woman movie has implications and impacts that go way beyond this one movie.

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Ghostbusters was Many Things and Most of them Great

Ghostbusters was great fun. Reading reviews, I see it really being reviewed as four different things, and depending on which, the reviews vary widely:
1) Remake of a beloved classic
2) A comedy
3) A movie, period
3) A work of female representation and empowerment
Ghostbusters 2016
For me:
1) Remake: It was that perfect blend of nods to the original yet different enough to be fresh. Much better than many of the other remakes in recent years.
2) Comedy: It was funny, I laughed out loud a number of times. But it lacked a character with the same level of comedic snark as Murray’s character in the original. This was not the fault of the actors, but of the writers.
3) Film: It was okay, but the plot was rather straightforward, there weren’t really any surprises. In the first, you had the mystery of Zuul and the keymaster/gatekeeper etc, with the (albeit light) romance subplot, which felt like multiple threads that came together in the end (like particle streams). This one didn’t feel quite as well developed plot-wise, the revelations along the way not really surprising. And the opening had a huge issue for me when I expected at first the character who seemed to have died in the basement to turn out to be possessed or a demon or something but no, he just inexplicably escaped?
4) Female Representation and Empowerment: Awesome. And well done. The jokes about internet comments were perfect. Lots of meta stuff to enjoy. And I got a bit teared up at the end, when they are all on the balcony. I can’t remember the exact words, but I felt when I saw it that they were talking as much about their accomplishment in making the film and doing it well as in defeating the giant Trump robot.
Well, okay, it wasn’t a Trump robot, but maybe in the sequel?
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Real or Not Real: Horrible Santa Movies

Santa Claus has starred in a lot of movies. I can only assume he uses the money from his acting gigs to upgrade his workshop, what with technology always advancing. Hard to build iPods with chisels, ya know?

But, sadly, not all of his movies are good.

Happy He-Man Holidays!

Here are some examples of the not-so-great ones. Some I made up. Some are real movies. And some I made up, and then found out they were real movies. How sad.

See if you can guess which are real, and which are bogus (answers are at the end). And just so the existence of hyperlinks does not give away which are the real ones, the false movies are linked to random Christmas-related material as well. If you are reading this at work, be aware that the YouTube videos will auto-start.

Enjoy.


1. SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS (1964)

Let’s just get this one right out of the way. A highly underrated classic that is often (unfairly) cited as the worst Christmas movie ever. But like all of the best science fiction, it was prophetic, with the Martian society reflecting our own future society. Children are treated as adults in small bodies, and medicated with sleep spray when they get too precocious. The concerns of the anti-hero, Voldar, predicted modern issues around the impacts that mass production of frivolous goods have had on our society. If the deep philosophical themes of this film had been taken to heart, it may well have helped us to avoid our current financial crises as caused by credit consumerism.

Indeed, I believe that history will mark this as one of the most important films of the 20th century.

Okay, sure, they have a robot made of a cardboard box and duct tubing. But come on, who’s to say someday we won’t build disposable robots exactly like that, huh? Again, just further proof that this move was revolutionary in its visionizing.

Speaking of Santa battling aliens …

2. SVP (SANTA VS. PREDATOR) (2004)

Santa’s elves, while searching for frozen cookie dough in the tundra of the North Pole, discover a space ship buried in the ice. They are soon plunged into Jingle Hell as a newly awakened Predator begins stalking Santa’s workshop and killing off its inhabitants one by one. But the Predator may have met its match, because Santa is no ordinary prey. If you liked the toy battle scenes from “Toys” or “Small Soldiers,” the body count of every Rambo movie combined, and the taste of Play-Doh, you’ll love this film. For those who are considering watching this with their children, be warned: the final scene, in which the Predator is lured into a giant Hungry Hungry Hippo pit and ripped apart by massive lunging Hippo heads, is particularly terrifying and bloody. Starring Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson as Santa Claus.

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Prometheus Produce

/Begin Transmission/ So, I followed clues left in several newspaper ads and found my way to Prometheus Produce, hoping to discover the origin of the amazing deal.  Signs at the entrance advised that I use standard bagging precautions, but being a pseudo-scientist I knew that to truly understand something, you have to look at it really really close and, if at all possible, touch it.  What could go wrong? /End Transmission/

Prometheus Produce

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Which Movies They Should (and Really Shouldn’t) Remake in 3D

My article on which movies they should (and really shouldn’t) remake in 3D is up at Fantasy Magazine: http://www.fantasy-magazine.com/2010/05/movies-they-should-and-really-shouldnt-make-3d/

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Fantasy Movie Music is Often Tragic not Magic

(From the Head of the Q.U. Crypto-Musicology Department)

There are so many things to mock about your average Fantasy movie. 

 

For some reason, movie studios have traditionally treated Fantasy films on about a level with porn (and slightly below homemade horror movies) in terms of plot, acting, dialogue, costuming, puppets, wigs, gratuitous nudity, men poking everything that moves in one way or another, and special effects (often involving dubious fluids).  There are a few notable exceptions, of course, but Fantasy movies are all too often embarrassingly bad.

 

But one cringe-inducing area rarely discussed is the music. 

One of the worst offenders in recent memory was Kull the Conqueror, which actually improved my opinion of Heavy Metal in comparison.
 

Clearly, Kull’s "luxurious" locks should be cut into a mullet.

 

When it comes to fantasy movies, multi-fret guitars are worse even than multi-bladed swords.
Guitar Sword and the Sorcerer


Click Here to Continue Your Education in Rockin Fantasy Movie Music …

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